


What was your name again?

by myoue



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, M/M, Stripping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-22
Updated: 2014-03-22
Packaged: 2018-01-16 15:04:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1351789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/myoue/pseuds/myoue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Levi is a cashier in a mood, and Aaron or Erin or whoever is just someone who strips in his store.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What was your name again?

**Author's Note:**

> ayyyy ao3 needs more cute coffee shop aus am i right or am i right

On some days, Levi’s not very subtle when he stares a customer down with enough contempt it has them quickly looking away out of (hopefully fear but more likely) embarrassment or confusion, or even when he has them running away with their tail between their legs if they’ve managed to place an order without crying or declaring Levi to a challenge out in the back alleyway. Although, that last one doesn’t happen as often because what burly man who initiates fights at a glance would come to order coffee from a mainstream hipster place like this anyway? Only ones with easily bruisable egos, that’s who, and Levi can handle those.

“It’s Jean,” someone named Jean says, a man who is certainly not burly and certainly not pissing Levi off in any way. As of yet. “Spell it right this time, will you? J-E-A-N,” he pronounces clearly and only mildly annoyingly.

“Uh huh,” Levi replies absently, continuing to write ‘John’ on the cup. “That’ll be five-seventy-five.”

He really hates working here. The line is ever longer as John leaves, and Levi takes the next moment to huff an irritated sigh to himself rather than call over the next customer with an ungrateful ‘how may I help you?’, because he in fact rarely ever says this line at all anymore. He doesn’t want to help people. He just wants to get out of here and buy himself some cheap instant coffee from 7-11.

The next customer comes over and Levi doesn’t say anything. They end up talking first anyway, “Hi. Can I get a large cappuccino?”

“Mm,” he murmurs, grabbing an L cup and readying his sharpie. “Can I get your name?”

The kid clears his throat before getting out, “Eren.”

“Eren,” Levi repeats, writing ‘Erin’ on the cup in scribbly letters. He wishes this name gimmick would hurry up and die out already.

“By the way, it’s not spelled like E-R-I-N. It’s spelled like E-R-E-N,” the kid says, as if he can see what Levi’s writing right through the cup. It makes him clench his jaw with the urge to just whip the cup at the kid’s face.

“O-kay,” Levi deadpans, scribbling over the original name and writing ‘Aaron' beneath it. The kid radiates a smile, blissfully ignorant. “That’ll be six-fifty.”

Erin takes out a mess of cash and coins, spilling them onto the counter like he owns the damn place, and begins counting change out. There are dollar bills in there but the kid is counting out nickels and dimes, and Levi is on the verge of pulling his hair out and adding it as seasoning to Erin’s drink.

“Take your time,” he says sarcastically, putting an equally sarcastic look on his face for everyone to see. “Not like I don’t have all day or other customers to serve.”

Aaron looks up at him, unsure of how to proceed. “I’m bad at math, sorry.”

“Do you want me to count it out for you? Or are you scared I’m going to rip you off?”

“Would you really?”

“Rip you off?”

“Yeah.”

“I just might.”

Erin turns back to the counter. “I’m good then.”

Levi swears he stands there for at least three and a half minutes listening to the kid whispering numbers to himself before he’s having change shoved into his hand.

“There. Five-fifty.”

Levi is gritting his teeth, coins spilling out of his palm. “It’s _six-fifty_ , you shit for brains.”

On the other side of the store, Levi can hear a faint _It’s not John, asshole!_

-

Several customers later, Levi is groping under the counter looking for his sanity when Hanji comes over with a half-made Americano.

“I think you should go help that kid,” Hanji tells him.

He’s dismally bored, but follows the gaze that points over towards the table at the corner of the store where he sees that kid from before flailing in his seat.

“Why should I?”

There aren’t any customers but it would take quite a lot for Levi to go out of his way to do things that aren’t in his job description.

“Because he’s cute,” Hanji says like Levi gives a shit. “Also if he makes a mess, you’re going to have to clean it up.”

“Fuck if I care. I’m the one who has to clean up everyone’s bullshit anyway.”

Hanji doesn’t flinch at all. “It looks like he’s stripping now.”

Levi looks over and the kid is now shrugging out of his jacket and letting it fall to the floor. Customers are looking over and one male looks like he’s taking out a wad of bills ready to shove down the kid’s pants. Levi has to jerk himself from staring before he’s muttering to himself and wondering when he’s getting paid because it’s surely not going to be enough for this.

“Hey, do you even have a brain or is there just goldfish living up there?” he asks once he’s made his way over.

The kid has his fingers on the edges of his shirt, ready to lift it up before he stops. Levi sees skin but pretends he doesn’t. “I’m sorry, what?”

Levi narrows his eyes at the rest of the customers, silently telling them to mind their own fucking business, most notably John who begins to put his money back in his pants. He turns back. “So you’re bad at math. Do you have impaired judgement and speech comprehension problems too?”

Aaron just looks at him. “I spilled my drink.”

“Are you serious.”

“Yeah.”

“Where?”

“On myself.”

Levi is looking down at the cup on the table without a lid and the frothed wetness on Aaron’s shirt. “For fuck’s sake.”

“It’s hot. Can you help me?”

“I don’t have time for your porn lines. I’ll get a cloth.”

“I meant the drink is hot.”

“ _I’m getting a cloth_.”

Levi’s brows are furrowed as he goes around the counter to get some kind of clean piece of rag. He sees Hanji eyeing him from the cash giving a cheeky grin. Levi puts up his middle finger.

He comes back, and Erin is now undoing his pants for some reason and Levi rushes over to grab his hand. “What in Satan’s ass are you doing? I said I was getting a cloth.”

“Yeah, but my pants are wet.”

“I also said to stop with the sex lines.”

“But the drink is hot.”

Levi hears snickering from the counter and he has the biggest urge to just drop everything and strangle these two people right now.

“Can you not wait for a goddamn minute? Jesus Christ,” Levi swears. He’s gripping Aaron’s wrist preventing any further action, and runs the cloth in his other hand down the front of the shirt. Erin lets out some weird half-giggling half-moaning until Levi begins feeling like a child molester. “Is there something wrong with you?”

“I’m sorry, it tickles.”

Levi is closing his eyes and trying to find the will to not kill himself. “Do you want me to shove this cloth down the front of your pants so you can at least pretend you’ve got testicles?”

“…No.”

“Then grow a pair and shut the fuck up.”

He’s wiping down the front of Erin’s pants until he realizes that while he’s deliberately ignoring the casual grunting and whimpering the kid continues to make, the rest of the customers probably aren’t. In fact, most of them have gotten up to leave in an attempt to save their Christian ears, except for John who looks about ready to wank off right then and there.

When Levi starts to hear insane laughter from the cash, he’s had enough and grabs Aaron’s arm to drag him towards the staff door, ignoring wolf whistles that he hopes are from Hanji and not his manager Erwin. He can handle Hanji but Erwin is just embarrassing.

They eventually get to the privacy of the staff lounge and Levi closes the door behind them. It smells of old clothes and body spray.

It’s quiet until, “You know, you wrote my name wrong on my cup. It’s not ‘Aaron’.”

“Shut up.”

“It’s E-R-E-N.”

“ _Shut up_ ,” Levi hisses. There hasn’t been a time when he regretted spelling names wrong on purpose more than now.

They stand there and Eren has the gall to look innocently confused with his zipper undone and pants still hanging open. “Uh…”

“Go ahead. Strip. You wanted to strip, right?”

Now Eren looks less like a mentally deficient squirrel and a little more like a deer caught in headlights. “Really?”

“What, don’t tell me you’re shy after almost giving a free show to everyone in the store.”

Eren shifts his eyes and glances around the room in a half-assed attempt at stalling for time. “I don’t know. We’re here alone, and you look like you’re about to sexually harass me or something.”

Levi rolls his eyes. “Aren’t you scared then?”

“Not really.”

He raises an eyebrow because this kid is fucking dumb. And Levi is not impressed.

“Just take off your damn clothes and I’ll get you a spare employees uniform or something.” He’s feeling a mixture of confliction and aggravation right now.

Because on one hand he’s searching through boxes for a t-shirt and pants that probably haven’t been washed in forever, and on the other hand when he turns around he has to stop and stare at what exactly is happening in today’s staff lounge.

Eren or Erin or Aaron, Levi doesn’t remember what his name is because suddenly a naked body is caressing his eyelids and is currently becoming more and more naked by the second. Pants and shirts are hitting the ground and the question of asking why Eren couldn’t wait until he was out of the room to change dies on his lips, and is instead replaced by thoughts of wow abs, smooth skin, shoulders, muscles, and wow those abs though. He’s wondering how young kids nowadays seem to have no shame with stripping in front of questionable strangers. And then Levi is remembering that he is the questionable stranger and he’s staring at a young boy’s body, which is probably illegal in most if not all states.

Levi blinks to get naked young boy out of his eyes before he’s stepping over and handing the clothes to this piece of jailbait.

“Here are your abs. I mean, clothes.” Fuck. How did he get that wrong. Those words aren’t even remotely alike.

Eren just takes the clothes with a face that says he didn’t catch anything Levi said except for the last part. “Thanks.” He grins a stupid grin.

Levi melts.

“I’ll just… wait outside. Call me. I mean, if you need anything.” Levi curses.

“Okay.”

He steps out. Fuck.

That room has something attractive in it. And it’s not going anywhere. Not for now. Not with Levi blocking the door.

What in Jesus Almighty does he do now.

-

It’s approximately six minutes later that he returns to the front. Hanji turns to him.

“That didn’t take long.”

“I know.”

“Did you guys do it?”

“No.”

“Did you do a quickie?”

“No.”

“Are you sure?”

“I am fucking sure we didn’t do a quickie.”

“Explain the boner then.”

“I will not.”

Hanji smiles knowingly, leaning on the counter. Levi is pouring himself a cup of espresso, wanting desperately to throw it in Hanji’s face right now.

“So where’d he go?”

“He left. I gave him some clothes which may or may not get back to us,” Levi says.

“You did what now?” Erwin cuts in out of nowhere.

Levi is gulping down scalding espresso because it’s less painful than this conversation right now. “I’ll pay for it. Take it out of my pay check, Erwin.”

He ignores the fact that both Erwin and Hanji make some sort of appreciative hums at the same time.

“Well now, doing something for a customer, Levi? Didn’t think I’d ever live long enough to see this,” Erwin says, clapping a hand on Levi’s shoulder like he’s congratulating his son for taking his first shit in the toilet.

“You’re right. You’re old as fuck,” Levi snaps. Anything to change the subject. Please, just get him out of here.

“Hi, um.”

They all look over at the voice and good fucking god, look who it is.

“It hasn’t even been ten minutes since you left,” Levi deadpans, and he finds himself having to hold Hanji back from leaning in too close to get a good look at the kid’s face.

Eren apparently is a natural at ignoring weirdness. “I know. I just wanted to leave you this.” He slides over the coffee cup with the incorrectly spelled name and it now has a set of numbers written on it in pen. “So you can call me if I forget to get the uniform back to you guys.”

They’re all staring, Levi most of all.

“Right,” he says, and he can hear muffled laughs from either side of him.

“I’ll see you then…” Eren leans forward a bit to narrow his eyes at his shirt. “…Levi.”

He’s not quite sure what to make of it when Eren smiles again before walking out, ass looking very cute in those employee standard pants.

Erwin apparently can’t hold it in anymore and starts bellowing laughter, and Hanji is grabbing onto Levi’s sleeve saying, “You guys did something! I know you did!”

“We didn’t!” he retorts.

“Explain this then!” Hanji takes the cup and holds it obscenely close to his face.

“Fuck off!” Levi grabs the cup and stomps away before he can take anymore comments from these half-baked idiots.

He’s in a corner, and he’s not sure how well he hides it, but he tears off the writing portion of the cup to put in the pocket of his uniform. He doesn’t hide it very well apparently, because he hears Hanji practically screaming behind him.

“I saw that!”

“You want to see your grave later?” he yells back.

He throws the rest of the cup in the garbage. But when he continues work, he knows there’s no use fighting the blush that rises and stays on his face and how warm he feels for the rest of the day.


End file.
